The news organizations have been hounding me, because everybody is dying to find out who Literary Kicks will endorse in the Presidential election. Well, the suspense is about to end.

First, let me say that there is no clear Beat choice here. I know Allen Ginsberg supports Ralph Nader, predicatably, and Nader does seem to be the only candidate without an ego the size of the Goodyear blimp. But nobody even knows he’s running — and if I’m going to support a candidate who nobody’s heard
of I’d probably go with net personality R. U. Sirius, who has a better website.

But let’s talk about Bob Dole. Dole is from Kansas, and being from Kansas gives you instant authenticity in the Beat universe. Remember Kerouac’s first trip across America in “On The Road“? He wished he was from Kansas, and damn, I wish I was from Kansas too!

But let’s face facts: Bob Dole is a friggin’ bore. That’s all there is to it. And I can’t stand it that he’s pulling all this “character” bullshit against Clinton so late in the campaign and pretending it’s not a desperation move. You know, I actually like it that Bill Clinton is a regular guy, that he makes mistakes and smokes weed and gets himself into trouble every now and then. He’s just trying to have some fun, and if a President of the United States can’t have some fun, then what the hell is it all about anyway?
Say Kerouac and Cassady had run into Bob Dole in their travels across America in the 40’s — I bet they would have run just as fast in the other direction. Maybe they would have even headed straight back for the East Coast right then and there, and maybe “On The Road” would have never even been written!

Bob Dole is just not a Beat guy. Literary Kicks endorses Bill Clinton for President of the United States of America.